- Eight Things to Know Before Dating An Entrepreneur
- Love or Loss: How Fares the Dating Scene for a CEO?
But I guess if you want to keep trying, maybe read some of the responses to this recent question from someone dating a surgeon, whose situation seems similar to yours? If so, great, but it's okay if the answer is no. If you married and had kids with this guy, you'd basically be a single parent.
But worse, because you'd be doing all the emotional labor of maintaining your relationship with him, doing all the emotional labor of maintaining his family relationships and social life how long until it's your responsibility to buy his parents' birthday presents , maintaining the household, all while you're a busy overachiever yourself. He hasn't shown any inclination to behave differently.
I'm not just going to say "dump this person. Are they willing to devote as much energy to this as they do their job? Are they willing to go to weekly couples counselling? For you, seeking patience, I think it comes down to "am I OK with how things are? If he was really in to you, he'd make time for you. He would, in fact, be neglecting his business for you.
And he'd be emotionally available to you. Don't settle for less than you deserve. Women are more complicated than men and that's why we often assume that when a man does certain things that it shouldn't necessarily be taken at face value. Because that's how we are.
Eight Things to Know Before Dating An Entrepreneur
If he doesn't have time for you Then a smart woman takes this at face value and simply realizes he's not that invested in her or the relationship. Just start dating other people. As someone suggested he probably won't even notice; and I'd be surprised if he wasn't already doing so himself anyway. He values his work more than spending time with you or friends, and if you're not happy with how things are right now, you won't be happy a month or a year or 5 years from now. If it was going to change he would be scaling his work back now that the company is successful, but he's not. He's telling you this very clearly, he is not done achieving and doesn't want to be held back.
The emotional unavailability which goes together with how much he works is not good for a longterm relationship. That he only spends more time with you when you kick up a fuss is not good, do you want to keep fighting for his attention? The amount of time you spend together is reasonable for a dating relationship where both people have other major responsibilities or interests, but imagine having a child with him - it would be on you or on hired help in the absence of family to do all of the heavy lifting, he would not be available when the child is sick, or when you have a deadline and need him to take over.
In our case we have family nearby thankfully, but it's still really hard because for him, his work comes first, having a child didn't change that at all although he told me it would. I think you should date other people, and consider learning to value and respect someone who works a more regular schedule, is stable, and is fairly content with how things are so they have the time and energy to take care of themselves, make you feel loved, build a life together, have kids together, because it sounds like that's what you really want.
A more balanced partner could allow you to reach your goals and support you instead of both of you striving and then throwing kids into the mix. This is sort of radical, especially on MeFi, but I find that increasing your love and respect for him is actually the way to go here. Stop thinking of him as "broken and bad at relationships, ignorant, and needing improvement.
This is wrong thinking, it is not really loving or kind, and it is, honestly, futile. Practice radical acceptance instead.
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Think of him as perfect unto himself, as a fully individual, adult, conscious, intelligent being who has chosen his path in life. Respect that he has chosen to dedicate his life to a career. You have chosen to dedicate your life to a balance of career and family, but as as your biological clock ticks, the balance may swing in favor of family. He is not on the same path as you, and that's okay. Also respect yourself, really get in touch with yourself, and fully appreciate your hopes, dreams and desires. Neither of you is broken or bad at relationships or bad at compromise or needs fixing.
You are both fine. Let him be free to be himself, and you be free to be yourself. And let him go if necessary. Communicate everything I just said to him, IE: I wish you the best of luck. I have reached a point in my life where I want to start a family and devote more of my time and attention away from work to that end.
To me, this is the most meaningful part of life and I can't continue to compromise on it. I would like to start seeing other people, what do you think? If not, you've broken up gracefully with no hard feelings. Running completely against the building consensus here First - I heartily second the radical acceptance suggested by quincunx. This is who he is. He has told you who he is, quite clearly. Expecting him to change completely is sort of unfair to him. To put it another way, the emotional unavailability is not a side effect of the entrepreneurship, it is a driving force.
Second - you asked for thoughts from mefites that are like this. I am in BigLaw, which is infamous for late nights and ridiculous work hours. And in my particular line of practice, I also run into a lot of the tech entrepreneurs. He's seeing you one or two nights and one full weekend day every week? That's a lot a lot. I was expecting one or two times a month. He's giving you more than he's got. So building off of those two thoughts, consider accepting that this is who he is, and backing off. See him much less, and he will likely be able to be far more present for the times that he is there.
If that isn't your cup of tea, then you should probably be seeing other people. As some food for thought, I see really nasty divorces happen all the time. One thought that the other would "really fall in love" and suddenly become emotionally available and available in real space. Please consider whether you two actually share the same values I dated a serial entrepreneur for a couple of months right as one of his businesses had just landed a several-million-dollar software contract, and the other was starting to take off.
I'll tell you what I did: I broke up with him. He remains the only man I've ever dated where I initiated the breakup. Besides the business stuff, though, he seemed to put everything in his life ahead of spending time with me: I had to call him once a week or so and beg him to let me buy him dinner just so I could see him. I could deal with him being a busy guy but not with the always-being-last part, although it sounds like you two are at least spending a decent amount of time together, so there's that.
But is that enough for you? Right after we split up, I decided I was done with men and was going to focus on finishing grad school and finding a better job. Surprise -- within a few months, I met a great guy who wanted to spend lots of time with me and we've been together ever since, almost 10 years. I got married at 19 to another 19 year old. At the time, he had a part time job and I got a lot of his attention. It was part of why I married him. I got a lot less of his time. I typically say that when we got married, he had a part time job and two full time hobbies and I was one of his hobbies.
The other hobby was gaming. We were friends for some years with a man who had a part time job and a full time hobby of gaming. He lived with his mother until she died when he was in his forties, and he inherited the house. I think after his mother died, he finally got a girlfriend. Meanwhile, I was raising two kids and seeing the world as a military wife. No, I do not wish my husband had continued working part time in order to prioritize time with me. I got most of what I wanted out of marrying him.
If you want children, a man like you are seeing currently is a good bet for being able to provide for a family. It takes 15 to 20 hours a week to establish and maintain an intimate relationship. It does not matter how that time is distributed. Doing most of it on the weekend is fine.
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My marriage defaulted to that, in part because of the long hours he worked. It is also fine if some of those hours occur while doing other things. For example, if you dropped by his place to help him pack for his trip, you could shoehorn in some additional time together without adding to his stress. When I was married, we usually had one car. A lot of conversation occurred while we drove him to work so I could keep the car. When we got two cars, the relationship deteriorated because we lost substantial built in conversation time.
You probably are not seeing him 15 hours a week. If you want this to work, you need to try to get in more time somehow. And, it will somehow need to be done in a way that doesn't subtract time from his job. This will involve brainstorming. Can you meet him for breakfast?
Can you stop by his office to bring him lunch and get 15 minutes of his time over lunch? Can you hit the gym together or not together or commute together? It sounds like he is probably not hugely short of that 15 hours and like he is making a serious effort. I would try like hell to find some creative means to get more of his time in a way that didn't subtract time from his work. This may well end up looking like the traditional wifely role of catering to him. Many people will tell you only a fool would do that. If people tell you that, consider if these are people who have successfully managed to do the married with kids and don't hate my spouse thing.
If they are perpetually single or have zero plans to have kids, it is possible their attitude and their lifestyle are intrinsically interrelated. Frankly, I don't think you're the issue here.
Love or Loss: How Fares the Dating Scene for a CEO?
Needing emotional availability is completely understandable and normal. I would contend that it's essential for most people. There is certainly room for compromise in relationships, but I think that's different from consciously suppressing your needs for someone who won't or can't meet those needs. What makes you happy? I dated someone who had a ton of commitments. Gym, family, friends and work.
He prided himself on being able to squeeze a minute and get six out of it. I didn't want to be a checkmark, I wanted more attention, and the resultant unhappiness, among other things, resulted in us splitting up. I am a career woman and don't want kids and am not too opinionated on marriage. Well the number of my failed relationships would indicate it's probably not very pleasent….
I was having a conversation here last week with one lady who appeared to be disillusioned into thinking it was about Gala meetings and being whisked away on spontaneous trips to Tahiti. She was also thinking she could spend her time investing money into the stock market and donating with her unlimited compassion and I think…implied I was sexist. I highly doubt that the encounters found in this book between the CEO and his girlfriend mirror reality.
Maybe in the movies, though. So realize I might be slightly off topic, but your question is relevant in that the topic was addressed in a business novel. Ask New Question Sign In. What would it be like dating a CEO? You will need to trust, while at an important meeting or absorbed by work he may not be able to answer your phone… Most likely there will be also meetings, very often away from home.
Should the CEO of an Startup date his coworker? Who is the most inspiring CEO till date, and why? What does it take to be a successful CEO? Answered Oct 30, Interesting that almost everyone referred to the CEO as male. This is my perspective as a female CEO for Esports Tickets , please note that this is from personal experience: Time spent together is extremely valuable, depending on your relationship dynamics, you may be the one doing all the planning for a date.
clublavoute.ca/gezuh-bedmar-y.php Reach the right people at the right time. Quora ads offer a vast variety of question topics to target readers looking for a solution, right now. You dismissed this ad. The feedback you provide will help us show you more relevant content in the future. Answered Mar 6, Well the number of my failed relationships would indicate it's probably not very pleasent… I was having a conversation here last week with one lady who appeared to be disillusioned into thinking it was about Gala meetings and being whisked away on spontaneous trips to Tahiti. Do you think your web app is perfect? What is the salary of the Quora CEO?
What all does it take to become a CEO of a successful company? What does a CEO of a start-up do? What does a typical day look like?